now i know why i became what i already was.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Randomize
