FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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