Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
