The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Randomize