i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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