There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Randomize
