did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Randomize
