I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
