I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
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