She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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