I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
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