Christians are straight up FREAKS
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
