Ambien. No doubt about it.
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Randomize