I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
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