i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize
