why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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