if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
