woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Randomize