Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
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