enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Randomize