I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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