Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
