i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Randomize
