Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
