you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I intend to get homeless drunk
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Randomize
