i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
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