One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Randomize
