I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
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