Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
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