I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
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