i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
This is not my ceiling
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
