I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Randomize
