So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
