see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
