remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Randomize
