The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize