I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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