y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
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