There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Randomize
