I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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