Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.