I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
