i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
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