you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize
