i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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