38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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