answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
