i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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