I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
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