Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
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