Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
soo... how was my night?
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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