Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
dude. I can hear the air.
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